Sleep

Ugh I can't sleep, I've been up all night every hour on the hour, only to wake up at 6am and theres no going back to sleep. I might go get a coffee and a newspaper and chill for a bit somewhere. I hate when I run out of my sleeping medication, it insures for a no sleep night thats for sure. Its a good thing its Sunday..maybe I have snow day syndrome! There wasn't much going on this weekend, basically relaxed yesterday and worked on the internet on a project I"m working on. I also watched Jack Ass 2 Friday night, it was actually pretty funny, I ripped it from a torrent and it was a really good copy. Today is supposed to be nice, I wouldn't mind taking a walk I think, or doing something! Last night all the girls from home called me, it was Karens surprise engagement party, and I spoke to so many friends, I miss them alot. We ended with promises to stay in touch and more. I also talked to my mom the other night, for about an hour, I fixed her email over the phone, its been messing up for a bit so she needed help with that. Of course its all better now... I have her running thunderbird, outlook express is kinda crap and it was acting like it a few months earlier, so we switchd and I put on an outlook skin so Dad can't tell the difference, and mom knows better. Its strange, I'm not sure what to take of our relationship at all, Moms friend wrote me an email awhile back saying that it would be good for me to get away. She said mom and I are like oil and water, which is indeed true. Family stuff though, I doubt anything will ever be the same. The scarey part is we are so much the same its crazy, but thats life I suppose, and I've dealt with that for good in my heart, I do miss my dad though, alot, and I worry because there is no one there to help him out with the work stuff, I'm hoping the boyfreinds do it because he isn't getting any younger thats for sure. I miss clay, I have 2 pictures of him on my wall ( my newphew), and of course my cat Mowgli, who is in better hands then I could have ever gave him. I want him to come out here, but he has claws so, we have new leather furniture, I'll need to do something thats for sure to inhibit that, and I"m not getting him declawed, theres no way. They do have these softclaws at work though that you glue on, they are like soft rubber and look to be really effective. That may be an idea. Last I heard though Monique and Lisa were so happy having him, I kinda want to leave him there too. I'm just scared if I go through one of my crashes again, I won't have a reason, my cat saved my life so many times so its going to be hard to not give in to things. I had one semi bad night here once, and thats it, so I think that I'm doing alot better, there wasn't many before that either. Adjusting to moving is weird, it creeps up on you, but I love it here, and feel alot stronger nad more independant, like I can accomplish things and I'm not around negative energy as much so its alot better. In fact when I do encounter a negative person, it really has such a bearing on me I want them to go away, and I remove myself from the situation now. Its kinda creepy feeling all that energy come at you, and I am so much more sensitive to it now then I was before, but at least I recognize it so thats good, I can and do get away from it. Well I'm going to sign off for now, I love this city!

Jill